The Budget Room

If moving was as easy as the interstate removalists had made it for us. Why can’t they take care of the rest of our lives? Making a big move can be a traumatic experience. Having made the move, and discovering that it was the wrong thing to do, can and does happen. This article is written to give those who are in just that kind of situation some support.

If only the removalists could re-pack all your belongings and ship them back to your home. The home that you have sold, and is not yours anymore anyway. If you are reading this article because you are in the situation where you wish you had never made the move, then hopefully you will find some strength. There are a number of reasons why things don’t turn out the way we had intended. The fact is, you are here now. It is time to find a way forward. Now is the time to stop and analyse the situation.

• Expectations. The one thing guaranteed about our expectations is they are not real. They could not be real because they are images and ideas in our mind. If they were real they would be something in front of us. We would have to be very lucky if a thought in our mind turned out to be something tangible in our hands.
• Blame. Are you beating yourself up? Have you decided that life is not working out the way it should because you did something wrong in the past? Do you have a sense of guilt and blame? If at anytime you are blaming yourself for doing something wrong, this is the time to stop. There is no blame. You made a decision to try something new. Perhaps you made the wrong decision. Perhaps, it is too early to tell. At the same time, you cannot blame yourself for the way things are. Learn to see your situation as separate from who you are. If you did make a mistake, there is no point bashing yourself about it. Look for what you can do with what you have now.
• It doesn’t end here. Sometimes we make a decision to do something. It does not turn out the way we planned, expected, or were promised. This is not the end of the road. It is important to remind ourselves, sometimes, actually most of the time, things do not work out the way we plan. This does not mean that life might not give us a favour.
• Move forward. The longer you spend thinking about what has gone wrong, what you did wrong, and how wrong your situation is, the longer you waste time not changing your situation to the way you want it. That is what this is about. Changing your current situation to the way you want it. This is your new focus.
• Who got you here? Most of the time, when we make a decision to do something, it is not only us who got us to the point of doing it. Did you move for a loved on? Did you move for a company promotion? There is a reason why you made the move. If it was you alone that made the decision, look at what it was you thought you were trying to benefit from. It might still be available. If it was someone who made promises to you, it is time you confronted them. Be calm about what you say and do. Renegotiate the terms of your contract or arrangement.

The interstate removalists can pack up your things and move you back to where you came from. It will probably already be harder to move back than stay. When life throws us a curve ball, we need to swing a little harder. Nothing ever works out exactly the way we planned, but it might work out fine in slightly another way. Give your new situation a chance. If you know it is completely wrong, look to work your way out of it. Standing tall and walking through each day is the only way forward.